Anniversary week special guest post by Shilpa Deshpande
This is something that happened when I was in the 8th grade. I prided myself on being a very strong, fearless and forthright. I also liked to think of myself as a no-nonsense person.
Mine was a co-ed school and most my classmates were at the age where the opposite sex was a subject of supreme interest. Everyone had flings or were rumored to have flings with someone or the other in school. The normal ones were supposed ‘chakkars’ between peers. 8th graders with 8th graders. The really A-list ones were where girls from my class had boyfriends from higher classes. One such ‘chakkar’ was between this really pretty girl in my class(lets call her M) and this good looking, albeit on the rough side, 11th class boy(P). Continue reading
“Sach ye hai bekaar humein gham hota hai… Jo chaha tha, duniya mein kam hota hai.” are the words of a popular Ghazal sung by Jagjit Singh.
That probably echoes the reality today. What we think, it hardly happens. It is not that the truth exists or that the truth is troublesome… it is our inability to take it in ‘as is’ form and live with it. After all, truth is not so good every time. How many of you can actually digest the fact that the person you loved unfortunately got married to some one else and is getting laid every night by a person you would love to hate till eternity? Do you actually say ‘how nice’ where (s)he says his/her spouse is very romantic? No! You just smile and say WTF to yourself. You wish you had better luck. But you didn’t and thats the god damn truth. What you do is probably just move on.
Its not just about this example (I probably quoted the one that will hit one of the the hardest). Truth is always difficult to accept and then to survive after you have accepted. A lie, for that matter, is very easily digested. Ask yourself how many times you have spoken the truth when you could have lied and easily got away. Most of you might answer audaciously say you spoke truth every or rather most of the times. I’d say this is one of the times when you didn’t. Fooling one self, in my opinion, is very easy. In the entire life we keep walking on the brink of the thin line between the true world and the false world. And it is very difficult to tell when we have crossed the line. Take for an example, we dont know what we are. Meaning, we are not aware of our own true potential. So we might be under confident and think we are no good. Or we might think the opposite. So most of the times we are portraying a false image of ourselves in front of the world. Afterall haven’t you seen a shabbily dressed voluptuous woman thinking she is one great xxx bomb around? The problem lies within us. We are oblivious to what we are and what the world around us is. Being a normal human being, we are bound to do it. But what if we all start accepting the truth as is? Will we lead a good life?
I’m happy with my life and that is indeed a truth. But if you ask me, my truth is a life I wanted to live on my own terms. So that I never have to speak a lie or accept a lie. But I know it is a, well… may be another truth. Can life give me one day to chug all my bound and live like a free bird? just one day!
There are some days, when you feel like grabbing a cup of coffee, pulling a chair in your balcony (or sitting in the bay window) and remembering all the good things that have ever happened to you. Well I’m in my office. I had loads of work and hardly got time to eat, forget coffee. Yet I’m feeling nostalgic. Have you ever been through these things in your childhood?
- When I chased kites on busy roads, risking my life although I could buy two of them in a rupee.
- Had a ice gola on a stall outside despite being warned by mom about how unhygienic it is. Not telling her, yet she managing to find from your red and yellow tongue.
- Had Pani Puri around the corner of our area, 8 pooris in 1 rupee.
- Remember when I wanted to buy a new cricket bat but Papa didn’t allow because I didn’t know how to play with it.
- I remember beating my neighbor because he once laughed at me when I fell down while cycling.
- I remember watching the Air Force show and fearing when the planes went really close to us while we were sitting and watching.
- I also remember when Papa was not doing good in business and how our family shared a Luna (moped). They were tough times walking kilometers to the market for fetching vegetables.
- I remember my mom crying when I wanted her to buy a toy for me for securing good marks in exams. She had no money. I remember how my parents never fought, despite troubled times.
- The first time I went to a cricket stadium to watch the match.
- And then I remember when Papa bagged a big contract, how we all celebrated on a dhaba.
- Learning to drive our first car, and driving really rash. Good times were back.
- The first time I proposed a girl, I was just 16 and didn’t know what I was doing. 🙂
- And then the first time when I kissed.
- I remember when my papa gifted me a bike on my 18th birthday. I remember driving it at high speeds, trying to impress girls.
To be fair there are so many things I’m remembering, I’m losing count. Sigh! Good ol’days.