We all know that Club Mahindra sells holidays. Rather, they sell the ‘stay’ part of the holidays. In case if you did not know, now I have told you that. While they might have the best of resorts (as they claim) in India and abroad (through tie ups), I some how can not buy their business model. So when I got a call from their tele-calling executive regarding a supposedly free holiday voucher as a part of the scheme, I decided to finally meet them. I regretted that decision later after having to spend 2 useless hours listening to the feel-good attempt by their managers. Here is what happened-
Me and my wife were met by a lady at their kiosk who made us fill out a form. She made us wait for some time, after which we were attended by an ugly looking fat guy. He some how couldn’t stop smirking, which put me off immediately. We informed him that we were in a hurry and that he should wrap it up quickly. But instead of honoring us, he decided to throw stupid questions at us. I will give you some examples and my answers later. Basically he was trying to break the ice and make things a bit comfortable, which wasn’t needed. We knew the whole idea behind it. Pay an amount now and enjoy stay at the choicest resorts 7 days a year for 25yrs. There were some discounts on offer as well as some free bees to be given out, including some meal vouchers, some free stay, some international memberships et all. The package cost was about 254 thousand Indian rupees. The positives were, we could beat the inflation and enjoy our stays at a discounted rates for 25 yrs. Negative point was, they were with limited capacity as of now. Moreover we could be tied up with Club Mahindra and their destinations for life.
Simple to understand? What is so damn difficult in explaining this? “But Sir please try to understand the concept behind this” The fatso kept telling. What the ‘F’ concept? I’d have yelled jibes at him, had I not kept cool. Still, I gave him enough. Here- read this conversation.
So how many times do you go for a holiday in a year Sir. Or do you at all go? He expected me to say ‘hardly’ My answer was, at least 4-5 times.
Next, When did you enjoy a candle lit dinner? Yesterday, I said.
He attempted one or two more, which I curtly replied. Finally he backed. The point I was trying to make was, if he was a salesman, he should have behaved like one. He was trying to be a psychiatrist. So I made sure he met his worst patient/customer of the day. He quickly sensed the danger and also involved his manager in the conversation. Over to this, they wanted to me to make the commitment of 2 and half lac rupees on the fly. It was suicidal 🙂
Demolishing idiots is fine. But demolishing idiot salesmen is such a mouth watering treat. I’m myself a sales consultant. I felt like writing an email to the top guys telling them to conclude this farce. Let us face it. They are selling holidays. And that is what they do. The facilities and the experience they give is neither new nor exclusive only to Club Mahindra. Trying to create a ‘feel goo’ aura behind the deal will not work. They need a better method to convince the customers, one of them being offering them a no obligations trial holiday.
Club Mahindra, are you listening? Sorry for being so livid. But ask your people to talk less. They irritate so much!