Why India?

A Hindi poem for you written by yours truly me. 🙂

England, America, Japan ghum aao,
India sa koi bejod nahi,
Kitna bhi koi advance kyun na ho
Mere desh ka koi todd nahi

Porridge khao ya sandwich, Pizza khao ya pasta
Firangi banne ka shauk hai hume, mehenga ho ya sasta
Kitna bhi tu jhoom le pyaare,
Nukkad ki paani Poori ka koi todd nahi

3 tier fly over ho ya multi lane highways
Banaya ho America ne to taarif karenge always
Rasta to rasta hai pyaare phir
Gaon ki galiyon ka koi todd nahi

Yahan kya rakha hai, muze to jaana hai America
Phir kyun na wo muze naukar banaye, main ho jaaunga wahi ka
Desh badlo chahe majhab pyaare
Apni mitti ka koi todd nahi

Tom Cruise, Brad Pitt, Catherine ho ya Angelina
Sab bade sitaarein hai, apne yaha kaun hai?
Arre? Khan bhai to ever green hai pyaare
Aur aaj bhi Madhuri ki ek muskaan ka koi todd nahi

Akele ho to book padh lengi, khana bananeko cook rakh lenge
Pyar kise chahiye? Hum to aisho aaram se rahenge
Kitna bhi tu aish kar le pyaare
Thak kar bhooke ghar lautne par maa ki daal-roti ka koi todd nai

Orkut, Gmail, Facebook, VOIP ho ya skype
Jise jab chahe contact kar lo, bas naam karma hai type
Sahi keh raha hai par phir bhi soch pyaare
Chai samose ki saath purani dosti ke kisse dohrane ka koi todd nahi

Pardes to phir pardes hai, chahe jitna bhi achha ho
Har jagah hum bhi to pahuch gaye hai, phir chaand ko hi le lo
Ab sab ye jaante hai aur sab maante hai
Hum hindustaaniyon ka koi todd nahi

Drunken Driving and Fun

10% of road accidents are due to drunken driving. Which makes it a logical statement that 90% of accidents are due to driving without drinking!

Piyo Sar Utha Ke!

Enjoy!

PS: You need to be intelligent enough to understand that this is a joke and not a suggestion

Just a caution

When I’m not in my senses, I advise people (including the near and dear ones) not to mess with me. The sad part is, I become deadly and I can ‘hurt’. I knew I’m like that. Just realised it once again… this time after many months, rather couple of years.

I would like to apologise to all those I have hurt till date. Some days for me are really bad. You probably messed with me on one such day. But I promise to be a better person ahead.

L9: Head over Heels, The Story

Taking the story of my friend ahead, continue from hereà L8: Head over Heels, The Build Up

Cut to Early November 2008; a chronological narration of how it happened

One fine Sunday morning, dada (my father) found this guy, thanks to the matrimonial pullout in The Tribune. (Didn’t I tell you? This is an age old tried and tested formula). Since I don’t live with them, I cant prevent them from looking at the news paper. Anyway, he read the profile of Mr. A (name changed to protect his identity). I will still name him A, because it is my favorite letter and this guy’s name also began with ‘A’.

Anyway, so after a few telephone calls between A and my parents, they fixed a date and time to meet. Next, the horoscopes were matched; our pictures were exchanged and approved. The whole world including my mother’s sisters, my sister and brother in law (who are in Switzerland), my uncle in the US, in short the whole world knew about it except me. Beat that! I got to know this by chance. Dada has a habit of speaking with me every morning, but that day he didn’t. When I called to ask where he was, he said he will call me back. I knew something was fishy???

Cut to November 30, 2008- Sunday evening 7.30 pm: Dad calls me and tells me about A and his family. 27 yr old, 5 feet 11 inches, electrical engineer, MBA from a reputed college, works with a big Indian IT giant and currently posted in London. He gives me his email address so that I can write him an email. I suppose similar routine was carried out at A’s house.

Being what I am, my questions was why should I write, why can’t he simply call me? Well… I’ll tell you, parents are good at emotional blackmail. This was followed by two quick calls from my brother in law and my Uncle, both said the same thing- be mild, talk nicely, you have to do it and don’t get emotionally involved. Ya… Ya, right! I am going to talk to this guy about marriage and not get emotional about it. Hmmm… I always told my parents please don’t expect me to agree for a matrimonial match after one meeting with the guy, like my sister did. It worked wonderfully well for her but who knows? I’m not taking it. And anyway, it was first time for me to actually talk marriage with a guy whom I had never met or talked to.

Next day, Monday- December 1, 2008; I couldn’t believe I was going to do something like this. My work does involve talking and meeting strangers. But this was different. Yet, I went ahead and wrote to him. In the mean time me and my best friend also checked out his profile on orkut (comments- profile, interesting, pic could have been better. When I told him later about it, he got a little upset that I was checking him out.) Actually when I wrote him, I had prayed that he shouldn’t reply. But I guess the others were praying harder because he replied. Not bad, because it began with an apology for the delayed response.

It was exciting yet fearful.  But hang on… why was I feeling scared and claustrophobic? Everyone was on me, asking for updates. I tried to enjoy it but never imagined the whole thing could be so stressful, my sinus was at its worst (please don’t ask me why). Yet, I pretended to my family that I am also excited. And gave only 4 adjectives to describe A- nice, sweet, sober and no nonsense person. Too much praise could have been interpreted as a yes.

A did write nice, warm and long mails. Was I liking it? I think I was. I surprised at me completely. I never knew I could do this. While we shared our histories, likes, dislikes over next two days. My fears began to creep in; some silly some serious ones. If I move from Delhi I will not be a call away from my family, will he love my family like his own? Take-2, he might be the one.

A week later, Friday- Dec 5, 2008: I was a total nervous wreck- filled up to the brim. In the mean time we also had exchanged our pictures (PERFECT- one word to describe him). I think it was not easy for him either. ‘A’ wanted to discuss and take his sisters opinion about me but he was afraid of sharing his perspective with me. He thought, a yes might mean a yes for marriage with me. I think, no I know I did overreact but we were not able to explain our state of minds to each other.  Another revelation; I am not the most mature person when it comes to taking a decision about marriage- but it was my first time. I was on my all time low, and finally I broke down, cried like a baby. A still continued to diligently reply my mails and endless list of questions. But I thought what the point of exchanging mails is when we are not sure about it so I told him to discuss it with his family and then get back to me. He said he will do it by the weekend or by Monday morning.

Cut to Sunday- Dec 7, 2008: I always loved my Sundays and wanted them to be never ending. But this Sunday was different. I couldn’t take the stress. I had to go for a Sunday Brunch at ITC Sheraton, and I managed to scrap through it. Dad called and told me, his mom wants to meet me. Meet me? God, why? Dad said A’s mom told him that she had discussed it with her son and that’s why they wanted to meet me. Did that mean a yes from A? I wanted to wait for him to tell me that he does want to take things forward. I was desperately waiting for a reply which did not come and all kind of crazy things were going on in my head (I told you he chooses to be silent when he is not sure of things).

Next day, Monday- December 8, 2008: I didn’t have a reply from him till about 1 pm. Maybe I was a little disappointed because he told me no matter what my decision is you have every right to know. But he did not write, so I did it- wrote the toughest mail of my life and made the hardest decision. I communicated by NO in not a very polite mail to this really nice guy. I did hate myself for doing it. Of course I don’t have to add that everyone was disappointed with me.  My main and only reason of doing it was to get over the tension and stress. I don’t know how I could be so impatient. I have been in more difficult situations. I thought till this episode that I was Miss Manage-it-all. But now I know I am not. He didn’t reply and we did not exchange mails for about two weeks till I penned down my experiences. (I have this strange habit of writing down what I feel) I sent it to him too because he was the inspiration behind it. He loved reading the story. I was happy he enjoyed reading it and he gave me his take on my story. What he felt and other things. Of course I replied back and finally asked him if he too had said no. Because I wanted to know his reason for backing out. But very smartly he avoided answering that question and then the pieces of the puzzle fell in place. He did not say no in first place so how could he gave the reason? It was my foolishness that pushed him back. I felt like kicking myself. I so badly wanted this to work out. He then said ‘why don’t you give a take on what he wrote’ and well we were exchanging our thoughts again about marriage and life in general. I was hoping it would lead me somewhere with him. Just one chance to meet him and I would tell him that I fell head over heels for him, even if it didn’t matter now. Albert Einstein once wrote ‘you cannot hold gravity responsible for falling in love, you just fall in love!’ he was so right. I just wanted him to know what I felt and was waiting for him to call me so that I could meet him and just say it. I didn’t care if he thought I am mad and even if he didn’t reciprocate it. Anyway, I don’t think that is going to happen, he is going back to London and I think he has found his Miss Right. In the last mail he wrote to me, it had a line ‘what goes around comes around’ … So will, lost love come around in my life too? I hope it does. And it happens soon because now I know it is a beautiful feeling.

Why I wrote this- Simple, I keep telling my colleagues that sometimes you don’t have to commit mistakes to learn from them you can learn from others experience. Here is my experience, you learn from it.

“Real love is always fated. It has been arranged before time. It is the most meticulously prepared of coincidences. And fate, of course, is simply a secular term for the will of God, and coincidence for His grace.” Joshua Harris

A dream

“You know a dream is like a river, ever changing as it flows.
And a dreamer’s just a vessel that must follow where it goes.
Trying to learn from what’s behind you and never knowing what’s in store
makes each day a constant battle just to stay between the shores.
And I will sail my vessel ’til the river runs dry.
Like a bird upon the wind, these waters are my sky.
I’ll never reach my destination if I never try,
So I will sail my vessel ’til the river runs dry.

Too many times we stand aside and let the water slip away.
To what we put off ’til tomorrow has now become today.
So don’t you sit upon the shore and say you’re satisfied.
Choose to chance the rapids and dare to dance the tides.”

PS: This is not my poem, but I read some where. The credits to the original author (if I find him/her)

Slumdog Millionaire wins Oscar awards

oscarsjpgDanny Boyle’s much acclaimed movie ‘Slumdog Millionaire’ swept the Oscar awards willing in 8 out of 10 categories in which it was nominated. This includes Best Picture and Best Direction for Danny Boyle, Best Original Song and Best Original Score for A R Rahman (for ‘Jai Ho…’) Best Film Editing for Chris Dickens, Best Sound Mixing for Ian Tapp, Resul Pookutty, Best Cinematography for Anthony Dod Mantle and Best Adapted Screenplay for Simon Beaufoy.

Jai Ho! Congratulations to the team and the people who made it possible.

L8: Head over Heels, The Build Up

My friend has shared her love story with me. Here is the second part. You can read part one here.

Cheers!

This is an absolute first had incident, an event that will always be close to my heart and taught me a few important lessons in life. I call it my sweet bitter experience (rather than the other way around).

Arranged marriage in India is a very scary affair. These are long lasting traditions that still find peak importance in life. You can say it is a ‘gathbandhan’ (A holy knot) between two families. My case was no different considering I belong to a traditional and conservative Indian family. Where you grow up with a belief that your husband will be short listed by the parents and grand parents and other elders in the family and your relatives and… anyway. (Though I won’t say select, because we do have a choice of saying a yes or a no)

Let me start with a confession first. Parents of a 27 yr old are not at peace at all no matter how well settled their child is. Every minute is spent thinking how and from where to find a ‘perfect match’ for their not so perfect daughter. In fact a day comes when the parents out of desperation do say; go find yourself a good boy. My question is- How? And Where?

I’ve always been single, a freebird you may say who enjoyed her share of crushes, infatuations and an occasional attentive glance from the opposite sex. Delhi is my karambhoomi where guys I met fell broadly in 5 categories. (I guess it might be the same every where). So the categories are

  • Married– can’t look at them.
  • Taken– already seeing someone- no point looking here. Let the one who are happy together stay together as well.
  • Friends– Never confuse relationships, sort of my personal policy
  • Some good guys who aren’t really straight
  • And last category- never mind, not worth it at all

So what do I do? Back to square one each time? Then I told my family, you want me to marry? Fine! Find me options to choose from. Mind it! Getting one married is a family mission. It is not just limited to parents responsibility (I just love this thing about big families). Trust me; this feeling of ‘all in the family’ is just great of course its adds to the already existing pressure but that’s a different story.

Next was the million dollar question. How will the family find an ideal match? They took three options:

Option 1 (Even I was surprised people still go for this. The age old formula is still a hit)- Matrimonial pull outs with newspapers.

Option 2– The new age mantra; shaadi.com and the likes. I am strictly against this one. It feels as if you are putting yourself up for sale. Come check me out. Don’t like it? No problem, refresh the page… But lot of people fancy this, millions including my grandmother who keeps telling me, “Aaj kal toh computer par ladkey miltey hein.” Wow!

Option 3– Oldest Formula, reference from family and friends. Since there is a dearth of good guys these ones are few and far in between.

Here I am, a 27 yr old, a PR professional working in Delhi for last 6yrs and living with my maternal grandparents. Youngest and only girl in the family left to be married. My life so far has been quite easy going, work-home-work and yes, friends too. But the biggest dream my grandfather (dad’s father) had in the last few years was to get me married. He even tried every trick in the book to convince me for it which also included a bribe. J I being a little naughty, I always had some trick to get out of it. My favorite reason was- I am only 24 and too young to get married (24 for last 4 yrs, he had poor memory because of old age so he believed it and my parents never corrected it either).